the long black bag

 

 

 

 

 

 

What if [negative emotions] have something essential to communicate to us and each other,

 and the real problem is the misguided attitude that negative feelings make us less evolved

 and need fixing? 

 

In the same way that we hold others at an arm’s length when they are too different from us,

 we avoid the inner encounter with otherness, excluding anything that doesn’t fit

 the image we’ve been building of ourselves.

‘Negative emotions’ don’t cease to exist because we ignore them.

 They just find other ways to express themselves. Sometimes we lash out 

inappropriately, having confusing crying fits, or feel protractedly numb. 

Most commonly, we slip into depression and anxiety. . . .

If not addressed in a person’s life, these issues can harden into ideologies

 which are then passed down through the generations. When you add to this 

equation a loud or charismatic leader, movements like Nazism will be born

 from the corroborative fear of otherness. 

 

We think of Nazis as evil, but the truth is we all have the potential for this kind of evil,

 which is ultimately the act of turning away from the suffering of others and ourselves.

Most of us have been raised to be moral, good, and agreeable, 

putting all of our ‘unacceptable’ qualities in what Robert Bly calls 

“The Long Black Bag” we drag behind us, or what Jung termed the personal

 “Shadow.” The Shadow is the place where everything we have forgotten,

 denied, rejected, or not yet discovered goes to live. 

 

 But when we try to live up to the impossible image of a spiritually enlightened, 

knowledgeable, selfless, patient, forgiving, easy-going, supportive, generous superhuman,

 the dark side of our nature just gains in power. . . .

You always have the choice to turn away or to look for redemption in the shadows. 

Sometimes turning away is exactly what you need in the moment, 

especially if you’re tired from toiling down in there.

 Trust that whatever you decide is the right decision.

 Also know that if the issue being presented has roots,

 it will still be there when you’re ready to look at it. . . .

We cannot simply remove the shadow all at once.

 It takes wisdom, courage, and forbearance for our shadows to reveal themselves

 to us so they can be faced and dealt with gently, compassionately, and firmly.

 

 

 

 

 

~   Toko-pa Turner

from Belonging: Remembering Ourselves Home

  Photo by Jozef Klopacka